Why don't you have a seat right over there?

Your IP has been recorded and we'll know exactly who you are by the time you finish reading this, you fucking degenerate! You've been caught red-handed trying to enter a contest that offered a date with a transgendered Benedict Arnold, and you're not going to talk your way out of it like those sickos try to do on that "To Catch A  Predator" show. Just like them, you listened to the "little head" and now you're life is over for all intents and purposes. You saw Chelsea Manning's picture and started fantasizing about servicing her woman-weiner...you just couldn't help but hit that "enter here" button, could you? Oh, I know...you were thinking it's not really gay if she looks female, but a dick is a dick, and you wanted to suck one; that's pretty fucking gay if you ask me. I'll bet you wish you'd stayed in the closet now, but it's too late.

The worst part of all this is that you were willing to overlook this hideous creature's traitorous past in your insatiable quest for shemale schlong...you wanted that lady-dick and nothing else in the whole world mattered. This freak of nature should have been in prison until 2045, but old 'Bama let her go free just before he left office. I'm sure you've heard the bizarre rumors about Michelle having a big black weiner swinging between her muscular thighs, and I think that pardon thing really said it all. Anyway, that's besides the point, because we're talking about YOU and your sick, twisted fantasies. The fact that you wanted to be a human cock-holster for a transgendered traitor makes you not only a debauched homosexual pervert, but also an enemy of the state who needs to be investigated, and possibly waterboarded, by the NSA.

Over the next 24 hours we'll be dutifully notifying your friends, family members, neighbors within a 5 mile radius of your home, your employer, and even kids you went to school with, of your disgusting sexually-deviant activities and your treasonous behavior. We'll let you deal with that for a week or two before we release the information to the media and the NSA.  Normally we'd suggest that you be more careful about what sort of links you click on in the future, but it's not likely that you'll have Internet access at Gitmo. If it's  any consolation, you'll probaly have lots of dick to gobble over the next decade or two (though most likely it'll be dirty Jihadist Muslim-meat), just don't get caught by the Marine guards down there...I hear they're a mean bunch of bastards who love abusing traitorous scum like you.

Good luck, and thanks for visiting captaincaleb.com!

Your IP and location have been recorded...sucks to be you!

visitor ip tracking website